Has your child ever said something that just crushed you and sent you to your knees?
In today’s bonus episode, I am sharing a personal parenting story.
Listen to this Podcast HERE
I wanted to share a personal mom story with you that happened recently at our house. This has been on my heart for a few weeks now and hopefully, it is something you can relate to.
We have been having some trouble with the morning attitude monster at our house lately. If you have kids of any age, especially toddlers or teens, you probably are very familiar with it! James is my youngest in Pre-K, and he has been a pill the last few weeks on the mornings he has had preschool. I stopped a show he was watching the other day, so he would focus on finishing his breakfast and a worksheet for school, and to say he wasn’t happy about it, would be an understatement! And he was quick to let me know it with the fit he threw! Even so, I did not give in, and after he dragged out what could have taken 3 minutes to take a painful 30 minutes, he was finally finished! I was trying to perk him back up before we had to leave for school, not wanting to drop him off upset to start the day.
So I’m telling James I love him and trying to get him to give me a hug, because typically he is my hugger, but NOT today!
I said, “James, don’t you love your mommy anymore?” I was of course kidding and thinking this would have him running into my arms! Not exactly. Instead, he looked right at me and shrugged his shoulders as if to say, “I don’t know if I love you.”
Ouch! If I’m honest, it was brutal and crushed me! Obviously he has been mad and thrown fits before, especially in those 2-3 year old years, but has never used actual words to hurt me before.
I sent him to his room for a bit as punishment, so I could get my thoughts together. When I finally went up to help him dress for school, I guess I was expecting an apology, but it never came! Later in the car on the way to school, I asked him if he had anything he wanted to say to me? NOPE, NOTHING! No apology, no anything! So I start telling him how he hurt my feelings and even when we get mad or upset, we should never go without telling the people we love in our lives, that we love them.
As I’m saying this out loud to James, it hits me! It was so clear that it was almost audible! God spoke to me, “Mallory what about me? This is how I feel all the time, even this very morning! I was saying I love you, and you were saying not now God…I am too busy with everything!”
WHOAH. This hit me really hard, but it’s so true isn’t it?
Everyday God is saying to us, “I love you, I love you, spend time with me.” Even when you are busy, or have been away on your own trying to keep everything under control, He is still saying, “I love you, come back to me….”
The way you and I often respond to this is, “wait just a minute Lord, I have to get A, B & C done first” or “I have this under control at the moment, I’ll be back when I need you.” In our own pride we are saying to God, “It’s not gotten bad enough yet to come to you yet, or I’ll check back in when I need you.
vThis breaks the Lord’s heart, just like James broke mine as I waited for his apology and tell me he loved me. Which he did do by the way, and now he tells me all the time words I told him, “We never go without telling the people we love that we love them.”
As I thought about it, I asked myself, do I ever go some days without telling the Lord that I love him? YES, I know I do!
Of course I love the Lord, but He doesn’t want our love and our time just when it works for us! God wants us ALL the time, in all situations! And I know so many times, I take His love for granted, knowing it is always there waiting on me.It’s easier to seek out prayer and wisdom from the Bible when something hard comes up in life: a death in the family or praying for wisdom with a difficult situation, etc.
But really, I should be spending time with the Lord just because I love Him, not because I have to or because something is going wrong in my life. I was reminded that knowing Jesus is about a RELATIONSHIP! For any relationship to grow, it takes time together. It’s not about a one-sided need.
This moment helped me understand in a real way, when our kids do something like this that cuts us deep as parents, how much more does our Heavenly Father hurt when we as His children do this to Him all the time?!
Thoughts? Do you have a story like this where the Lord taught you something in the midst of your parenting? I would love to hear it! Leave a comment below or email me directly You can email me directly! Thanks and have a blessed day!!
Listen to this Podcast HERE